It is one of the aspects that are affected after the birth of a baby, when suddenly those who were a couple and lovers become exclusively parents. Everything else seems to disappear, or at least descend several positions on the priority scale. Quiet, it is normal for sexual desire to rise again as the months go by and we adapt to family life with the baby. But there may be something we do and that helps that end.
If you want to improve sex life and, in general, the relationship with your partner, share the care of children as far as possible. According to a recent investigation, egalitarian couples who share between 40 and 60 percent of child care duties (from reading bedtime stories, changing diapers, games in the park ...) not only They have higher quality relationships than the other couples, they also have the best sex lives.
These egalitarian couples had fewer discussions, something that could be contradictory if we thought that, when only one of the children was occupied, the other has nothing to say or does not interfere in that "task" of care. But of course, it is precisely that discussions could come because the member of the couple who least cares for the children is not allowed to interfere, or discussions for any reason other than the raising of the children and that takes us away from the couple (because we don't share a job outside the home or inside the house, we can understand the other member worse, since it is more difficult to put ourselves in their place
Couples who share more perceive that they have higher quality relationships and greater satisfaction regarding their sex life, although the number of relationships was similar in all couples, also in the "traditional" where women are primarily responsible for household chores and childcare. But in all those "traditional" cases and he saw less satisfaction in terms of the relationship and sexual life.
A curious aspect of the study is that in the case of "traditional inverse" families, that is, where men take care of most of the childcare and women work outside the home, they were more satisfied than traditional couples, except in one area: men in these cases tended to evaluate the frequency of sexual relations at the lowest level of satisfaction.
The work was led by Dan Carlson, a sociologist at Georgia State University and co-author of the report that has just been presented at the annual conference of the American Sociological Association (American Association of Sociology, Chicago, United States).
According to the sociologist, it has been seen over the last decades in the United States that the frequency of sexual relations has decreased in all types of families, except in this egalitarian model, which has increased. At present, it seems that a separate distribution of work at home and abroad, without sharing tasks, is a strong predictor of divorce.
Of course, this study only focuses on heterosexual couples, about 500 couples of the MARS Survey on Relations and Civil Status of 2006. Nor did it take into account care such as giving food to the baby or bathing children, but rather spending time playing with them, supervise and monitor them, so it would be interesting to expand the spectrum of analyzed data.
But it is significant that the conclusions show differences from other similar studies a couple of decades ago, which leads Dan Carlson to conclude that we have improved in terms of what gender equality means. Another study by the author in 2014 pointed in this same direction.
That is to say, that, at present, the tendency in public opinion is increasingly rejecting that men and women act in traditional separate spheres, while moving towards embracing shared responsibility, both for paid work and for the unpaid.
The gap that existed decades ago between the roles of women and men in the home has narrowed and although in most families the woman remains the most responsible for the tasks and care of children, the difference with respect to What man does is much less, that he now spends more time with children and at home.
It is likely that people who feel that the division of labor is fair, have a more positive family life in their relationships and sex life (Which does not mean that there are "traditional" couples who consider their role to be fair and are also satisfied, although this is not reflected in the study we are talking about today).
This same year, a survey in the United States conducted between men and women 18 to 32 years old concluded that, among people with university education, 63% of men and 62% of women said they intended to Share work and home rights equally with your partners. For those with a level of secondary education, 82% of men and 59% of women said they intended to form this type of egalitarian unions.
According to this investigation, he is predicted a better family and sexual life for couples who decide to share household chores and childcare. Couples who are convinced that this is the best will find themselves more satisfied with themselves, even overcoming the harsh demands of work away from home and the scarce facilities of conciliation policies.
Photos | iStock
Via | Washingtong Post
In Babies and more | Postpartum sexuality, Sexual intercourse during breastfeeding
