"They rarely tell us what really happens in a house with young children." We interviewed Cecilia Jan

Cecilia Jan was born in Taiwan in 1974 and currently coordinates the blog "De mamas & de papa" of El País. He came to that job after doing the Master of Journalism in El País, and after having worked in other sectors.

Now he works on what he likes, because combines his vocation to write with the topics that occupy much of his day to day. And is that Cecilia is the mother of three children. But in addition to all this, and as flaunting a waste of energy, he has written a book that goes on sale today and is called "Things that nobody told you before having children", edited by Planet.

I will tell you more about the book in a few days, and Cecilia We have it here today in an interview coinciding with the release of "Things that nobody told you ...". Peques y Más.- "Things nobody told you before having children" is the title of your book, why? Do you think we have idealized motherhood or fatherhood?

Cecilia Jan.- I think that all fathers and mothers have ever had that feeling of "why nobody told me before ...?" Because it is true that we have idealized the fact of having children, at least in our society. Normally we wait so long to have them - have the job, the house, the perfect partner ... - that we believe they are not going anymore. And when they arrive ... They're not going anymore, but they also turn our lives upside down, much more than we think.

And the funny thing is that they rarely tell us, or want to hear, what really happens in a house with young children. We are left with the idea that there will be some changes - sleep less, change diapers, push a cart - but without realizing that it revolutionizes everything: your customs, your character, your life as a couple, the decoration of your house, the organization , The priorities…

One of the objectives I intend with the book is to relativize, make people laugh, realize that these things that happen to us and that make us angry or depleted happen to all fathers and mothers

PyM.- Three children give a lot of experience, don't you? But you affirm that you still feel like a first-time mother. How do you explain it?

C.J.- Because every age is a challenge, a novelty. Even every day. And every child is different. My children are still small, they are six and a half years old, five and almost three. Of course, with the second and third, we had some much more automated things, such as bathrooms, diapers, dressing them ... But they have different characters, so what earned you for the elderly or the second, is not worth for the third . And the first is paving the way, but everything is new: now we are in the homework phase, getting him to like reading, worrying if he has a problem with his friends, if he doesn't know how to defend himself ... And then another age will come and other problems, and so on ... the infinite.

PyM.- For you, what is the best thing about being a mother? ... and the worst?

C.J.- The best, the fun moments with my children: when they play together, without fighting, or do the clown, because the three are very clowns. And discovering your ability to love them all, and how, at least at this age, they want you no matter what. The worst, I realize that, as I have ever written on my blog, sometimes I fall on the dark side, and I get angry, I lose my temper, I scream ...

PyM.- I think that in recent years, we have witnessed a proliferation of books aimed at parents who have established themselves as guides, manuals ... And I do not say that they have not guided us, but the truth is that the direct experience of mothers or fathers who try to survive the daily trajín and then relativize everything and make us laugh a little.

What do you want with your book?

C.J.- Precisely what you say, relativize, make people laugh, realize that these things that happen to us and that make us angry or exhausted happen to all fathers and mothers. Too I include some practical advice from the point of view of a mother with three children that they have served me, and that I would have liked someone to explain to me in their day. But above all, relativize and make people laugh.

They rarely tell us, or want to hear, what really happens in a house with young children

PyM.- What do your children say about your literary facet?

C.J.- They do not find out. For them, books are always stories. At the most, David, the eldest, when I have told him that I have written a book, has asked me “and for what?”… I do not think I am impressed with anything I do, unless it comes out in a Star Wars movie.

PyM.- You are a journalist, blogger, mother ... (I leave more things for sure); and you put the blanket on your head writing a book, you certainly don't lack motivation. Are you happy with this one that you call the 'fourth child'? Tell us why we would like to read it.

C.J.- Of course I am happy, although now that I already have it in my hands, as a real book, I dare not read it, I will not find errata (that is professional deformation) ... I hope that fathers and mothers like it, about all recent because I think they will feel identified with many of the things I tell, and of course, as the saying goes, bad for many ... I also hope that those who already have the idea of ​​having children but who have not yet arrived will like it and be useful. It seems very tremendous what I tell, but in reality, it is also fun, beautiful and rewarding, so I hope not to discourage you!

And if Cecilia is happy with her book, we are even more for having her here, telling us a little more about her experience as a mother, and having introduced us "Things that nobody told you before having children."

Before we finish, a suggestion for parents who read us: there are only a few days left for Mother's Day, and I thought that your classmates might like to read this book. If you agree with me, look it up in your nearest bookstore. The price? 16.90 in paper version, 11.99 in digital version.

Thanks Cecilia, it was a pleasure for me to have met you.

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